I'm just not feeling any compulsion to do any of the classic "Nicole" stuff lately. I had a great time in Colorado since I last wrote, had some more adventures at Disney yesterday, but... meh.
I don't want to write.
I don't want to run.
And I don't feel guilty for not wanting to do either of these things. Weird.
I didn't early register for the runDisney Princess Half Marathon two weeks ago. That used to be a "bucket list" race. I love runDisney. And one of the perks of living in Florida now is that I can do these races without having to fly anywhere to do them (disregard my desire this year to earn a "Coast to Coast" challenge medal - attainable only by running a half marathon at Disney World and a half marathon at Disneyland in the same calendar year - and my subsequent registration for the Avengers Half Marathon in California in November).
Also, a perk of being a Disney annual passholder is the ability to register a week earlier than everybody else for runDisney races. I'm not known to pass up on perks.
But I let the early registration date pass.
Then I let the regular registration date pass.
So, no. I'm not going to be running the Princess Half Marathon.
And I'm feeling really apathetic about the runDisney race I am registered for right now.
I don't even feel the need to analyze why I'm feeling this way, as I've done so heavily in the past.
But let's do a little analysis anyway. Maybe it will help my old self return.
- Pokémon Go. I've gotta catch 'em all. There's no time for running when I've got to strategize Team Instinct's rise to glory.
- Altitude sickness. I woke up every morning with a sore throat in Colorado and chalked it up to being well above sea level. But nah, I really was sick. Still fighting off the cold even now that I'm home.
I know the real reason. And for the first time, I don't want to publicly share. Because maybe this is only a phase. Maybe it's not permanent. And maybe I'll be back to doing typical "Nicole" things tomorrow.
Don't misunderstand. I am very content with life right now. I'm ok with not caring.
It's just... while I know why I'm feeling a lack of interest about the race, I'm not sure I understand why I'm ok not caring about it.