Disclaimer - I'm not some pampered privileged princess. Groupon/Living Social/etc. has made monthly massage affordable for me - the only drawback is that these types of deals are usually good for one-time use only, meaning I'm seeing a different massage therapist every single month. This is not a concern for me as I can count on one hand the number of times I've received a bad massage.
However, it also means I don't know who is going to be working on me...
...and when I show up for my appointment and some dude introduces himself as my massage therapist, I'm all like:
Yes, I discriminate. I'm a terrible person. But here's the thing - I'm there to relax and feel better, and I have a really difficult time doing that with a male massage therapist. My mind immediately goes to every single flaw on my body. Stretch marks. Scars. Chipped toenail polish and feet that still haven't entirely healed from a poorly thought-out beach run.
The logical, rational part of me rolls her eyes at the self-conscious, insecure me. Deep down, I know my thoughts are ridiculous. Why would my imperfections bother him any more than they would a female therapist? If they did, wouldn't he just choose a different line of work? He probably sees a lot of "weird stuff" on all kinds of random people - my "weird stuff" doesn't matter. Anybody who goes into massage, regardless of gender, is probably pretty sensitive, cares about making people feel better. and - at the end of the day - is just trying to pay the bills like everyone else.
I've never had a bad experience with a male therapist, and last night didn't break the streak. Once I turned my irrational mind off, the massage was pretty amazing. Don't know if these are all massage-related or not, but I slept well last night, had a great run this morning, and am feeling really good today.
But the next time I have a male therapist, will I remember all of this or will I go right back to feeling self-conscious?
I need to get over myself.
73 days left.
Today's Exercise: First run in my new neighborhood
|HC Latte||Chili, coffee w/ cream||peppermint tea||chicken apple sausage, baby spinach salad|